My philosophy of personal change and growth was developed from nearly 40 years of wandering in the metaphorical desert. I strayed from my path as a 12-year old military brat who’d just moved to her 9th state and was desperate to fit in. After a number of years getting good and truly lost, I made my way back to myself… and beyond.
I’m now thriving at 51, with a very clear mission of empowering women to become confident creators, serving as a sherpa through the desert that I know so well: the endless desolation with no visible path; how to get out of quicksand; how to find water that quenches the soul; and most importantly, how to tap your own inner wisdom to find your way home.
“A coach can’t take you deeper than they’ve been themselves.” – Rich Litvin, master coach
I started making real breakthroughs when I realized that my experience in corporate strategy could be applied to getting myself out of the desert. The guidelines and principles that make a thriving business can also create a thriving life.
Below you’ll find my ABCs, which are the three attributes of a confident creator of her life and work. You’ll also find the 5 Principles that I use to guide my collaborators (what I call my clients) in sourcing their alignment, belief and clarity.
The ABC of Being a Confident Creator
Nothing happens until you’re aligned with the core truth of who you are.
Nothing happens until you believe that it can happen.
Nothing happens without clarity on what you want to create and the near-term steps to create it.
All the rah-rah motivation books won’t help you if you’ve built a life on ground that’s not yours (Believe me, I’ve tried.) Motivation magically appears when what you do is aligned with who you truly are, because you’re then creating from your source of joy and power.
This is about releasing the internal barriers you’ve built against your ability to thrive, which are based in learned fears, shame, or simply a lack of imagination. We replace them with new beliefs by reprogramming our infinitely plastic brain.
With good alignment, clarity falls into place… sometimes quickly, sometimes not. The goal is (at minimum) to have clarity on the outcome and how you want to feel, and be open to the form that it will take. Patience is key; let the answers unfold as you drop into your truth.
The 5 Principles of Confident Creation
Start with NO. When you can’t find something on a cluttered desk, simply remove the clutter. As Steve Jobs famously said, “focus is about saying no.” We can’t see our Hell Yes without removing the physical and mental clutter that’s accumulated through the years and getting good at boundary setting.
Aim towards how you want to feel. Human beings are motivated by feelings, not logic. What are your core needs that must be met? What lights you up? I translated my extensive knowledge of consumer behavior into a self-discovery packet of 28 Archetypes, 12 Core Needs, 241 Values, and associated Feelings to help you find your YES.
Go backward to go forward. If you’re at a dead end, all the motivation in the world won’t help you. We need to turn around and find where we missed the trailhead with our name on it. I subscribe to the Jungian-inspired Acorn Theory articulated by James Hillman, which says that the seeds of future greatness were visible when we were very young. So we’ll tap into your inner 8-year-old coach to lead the way.
Take radical ownership. Stop pushing away what’s uncomfortable; by embracing our shadow, we are healed and our barriers dissolve. Often, those awkward traits or feelings that we’ve tried to disown are the source of our true power. I bring tools from meditation and somatic practice to help with this one.
Navigate life like a bat. Intuition will take you so much farther than logic alone. Once you’ve calibrated your YES and NO, and you have clarity on how you want to feel, you’ll benefit from a powerful extra sense to more accurately and consistently lead you in the right direction.